


Unrequited

by lindsey_grissom



Category: Will & Grace
Genre: F/M, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-07-27
Updated: 2004-11-29
Packaged: 2017-10-10 13:24:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/100257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lindsey_grissom/pseuds/lindsey_grissom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>'I love you' he whispered and she couldn't help wishing it meant so much more.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

She was sitting at her desk 'working', when he flounced through the open door. The sarcastic remarks had readied themselves on her tongue, before he even opened his mouth. She had to smile at his excited face as he bounced around the office, the words leaving his mouth faster than they could enter her ears.

She smiled, nodded and occasionally giggled when she felt it was expected, never really knowing with what she was agreeing to. Her mind was elsewhere as usual. Unconsciously she moved to the coffee maker and poured herself a martini, still nodding in time to Jack's one-sided conversation. Seating herself back at her desk, her eyes wandered to his hair as it flapped around on his head. She loved it when his hair was long. She loved how it felt when she ran her fingers through it while they touched each other inappropriately. She moved her gaze to his eyes, and for a moment she couldn't help the jealousy she felt, when she found his eyes to be focused on Grace and not her. Mentally shaking the feeling away, she continued to look into his eyes, glad that the absence of his gaze allowed her to watch him without having to make snappy excuses when she stared too long.

What was it they said? Eyes are the windows to the soul. That was definitely true in Jack's case. One look in his eyes and she knew exactly what he felt, needed and wanted, even if she didn't let on that she knew. Luckily her own eyes weren't windows, or perhaps they were but the curtains where drawn, either way she was thankful that no one saw into her soul. In fact, thinking about it, she doubted many people believed she even had a soul, at least not after selling it to the devil for another bottle of tequila. Well, that was what she wanted them to think after all. If she didn't have feelings, then no one could hurt them.

Making other people believe it helped make it seem true. As she watched Jack approach her, she remembered that she did have feelings, strong feelings that were so well hidden even she had lost them for a while.

When she thought about it, Jack was the only person she knew that could bring these feelings out from their hiding place in her heart. Oh yeh, she had one of those too, contrary to popular belief. And it was beating over time as she felt his arms sneak around her waist, and his hands rest on her stomach.

"I love you"; he whispered into her ear, sending shivers down her spine and pain through her heart. It was an innocent remark from him and he didn't know how much she wished for it to mean more.

As she replied in kind, her heart screamed at him to know that she meant more than just an act of friendship. At the same time her mind screamed back reminding her of the reality of his sexuality as he sat on the desk in front of her and described his latest boyfriend to her. While her heart and mind battled within her, she gulped down the remainder of her drink, smiling as it had the desired affect of dulling the voices inside. They were all right about one thing; she did drink and pop pills to escape, not just to escape reality, but to escape herself.

Thinking her smile was caused by his words, Jack jumped up to hug her and show her how glad he was that she was happy for him. Well she was happy for him. Sort of. She wanted him to be happy, she just couldn't help wishing she were the one to make that happen.

Breathing in his scent while he gripped her tight, she repeated her daily mantra;

_'He's here. He's queer. Get used to it!'_

It may be cold, but it was the only way to get through to herself that it was never going to happen. Handing him her platinum card so he could buy a new outfit for his date that night, she watched him kiss her on the forehead and then slip out of the office, the door making an empty thud as it closed behind him.

In her mind she felt a single tear slide down her cheek, outwardly nothing showed. Her emotional mask was far too good; to well perfected to crack like that.

Instead she poured herself another drink; the liquid disappearing down her throat, taking with it her recent thoughts. Flicking through her magazine, she half listened to Grace complain about a client's bad taste as she allowed her mind to fill with thoughts of designer clothes and where her next drink was coming from, forming a cloud in her head that once again hid the thoughts and feelings no one would ever know she had.


	2. Chapter 2

He was walking towards her penthouse when her limo pulled up. Jogging towards it, but keeping unusually quiet, he watched as she slowly stepped out. Slowing to a walk again, he stared at her as she walked amazingly steadily towards the entrance to the hotel.

It always amazed him how steadily she walked after all the alcohol she drank. Most people would be all over the place if they drank half of what she ingested, and yet she seemed almost sober in her inebriated state. That was only one of the things about her that amazed him.

As she disappeared behind the hotel doors his mind drifted over the other little things that did. Sometimes, when they hugged he was amazed at how small she really was, at how delicate she could seem sometimes. He laughed aloud at that thought but silenced quickly upon seeing the stares thrown at him by the receptionist. Karen would seriously hurt him for calling her delicate, but she was.

There were certain times when he would look at her and she would seem sort of lost, she would look at him for ages and then something would pass across her face before she'd take a large gulp of one drink or another and she'd look different after that. He liked when she let her emotions show, it made her look so human. It was at times like that that he wished he could just hold her; to take away whatever it was that troubled her. He rarely ever felt the urge to comfort anybody, but she was different. She just seemed to bring out his gentlemanly side, his need to protect the ones he loved.

Riding up in the elevator he began to think about the few times they had hugged, sure they played with each other all the time, kissing, groping, it was second nature to them now, but it was those times when they hugged for comfort, not for fun that stuck out in his memory.

Neither would admit to needing comfort of course.

To anyone else the hugs would seem like any other, but they would hold on a little longer, a little tighter, and he would feel her tremble slightly in his arms before she straightened up and they pulled away from each other. He'd surprised himself several times, wishing she hadn't pulled away so fast. But he'd quickly pushed the feeling aside, not wanting to look too deep into it.

He'd caught up with her now. And he watched in silence as she went about ordering the maids away. She had her hair down again today, just fanning out around her face and he knew it was as soft as it looked.

How many times had he watched as she styled her hair? It was only occasionally that she had Stylist do it, usually, he knew, she enjoyed doing it herself and it was at these times she had it down. He loved it down; it seemed to bounce around her as she walked about the room.

He watched with breath held as she turned towards him, a smile ready to form on his lips and a remark to counter her surprise already in mind, but neither came forward. She stopped turning, her gaze inches from his direction, looking out of one of the huge windows. He knew not only by her lack of noticing him but also by her expression that she was deep in thought and he took the opportunity to study her features.

She was gorgeous.

No one could deny that. And beneath her tough, uncaring exterior he was sure there lay so much more, if only she let someone in close enough to see it. As he watched her, he wondered not for the first time what it would be like to be that someone. To be _the_ man in Karen's life.

But he knew he couldn't. As much as he loved her he knew he was gay, and even she couldn't change that. If only she was a man. Well that wasn't likely to happen but he was eternally happy to have her in his life.

She turned to face him then. A strange look passing over her soft features at the sight of him.  
One blink later and it was gone, replaced by her familiar surprise and confusion. While she asked him why he was there he barely meshed together a response before she was pulling him by the hand back out the door for some late night shopping.

He realised then, they may not be a couple but they would be just fine. Nothing would change, but then it didn't need to. Who knew, maybe they would even be the next Will and Grace. He shuddered as that thought crossed his mind and looking to where Karen sat opposite him in the limo, he noticed she held no drink in her hand, no pills ready to pop.

Smiling at her once then turning to face out the window at the cars they passed, he thought; _maybe some things would change after all._

 

** _End._ **


End file.
